In the realm of mental health and personal growth, couples therapy and individual therapy are two powerful tools that can facilitate healing and transformation. When it comes to relationship dynamics, addressing both the collective and individual needs of partners is essential for fostering healthy connections. In this blog post, we will delve into the relationship between couples therapy and individual therapy, highlighting their interplay and the benefits they bring to the individuals within the couple.

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It’s one thing to spend hour with your partner on weekends, evenings, and vacation. It’s quite another thing to negotiate shelter-in-place with someone you’re accustomed to not seeing during work hours. In addition to filling any or all the traditional relationship roles of lover, companion, and co-parent, your partner is suddenly your coworker, too!

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The SF Marriage and Couple Center offers Pre-Marital Therapy for those couples who want to talk about difficult topics pre-marriage. We offer pre-marriage short term and long term counseling services in Oakland and San Francisco.

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In the 21st century, our desires for connection have found new outlets through the internet. Websites and apps such as OKCupid, Bumble, Tinder, and Match.com have helped couples come together in ways the 20th century mind could never have envisioned. At the same time, connecting through this medium presents new and prevalent challenges that many single individuals may struggle with, perhaps even leading them to give up on the idea of meeting someone online.

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Emotionally-Focused Therapy is an empirically-based couples therapy technique established by Dr. Sue Johnson in the mid-1980's. This technique aims to bring partners closer together through experiences of emotional processing, in-the-moment awareness, and secure, healthy connection between two partners.

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Red flags are commonly described as signs that arise early in relationships pointing to a potentially negative or toxic pattern than can develop further if not attended to. A friend of mine once said, when you're in love, you see a person with rose-colored glasses. These glasses can make red flags just look like flags.

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The Bay Area is one of the most abundant locations in the United States when it comes to taking your date to cool places. From camping and beachside walks to fancy restaurants and unique activities, you'll be sure to impress your Bumble or Tinder date by taking them to some of these lovely spots.

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Perhaps you're struggling with anger in your relationship, balancing duties, taking care of children, sexual problems, a lack of intimacy, managing long-distance relationships, imbalances in the work/home spectrum... the list goes on! Unlike individual therapists who help a client achieve their personal goals, couples therapists must be skilled at handling the differences that arise when two people co-exist in close quarters.

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Anger is one of the most powerful human emotions we can encounter. It can take many forms, ranging from resentment and seething, to rage and violence. However, unleashing these forms of anger can lead to ruptures in relationships with our loved ones which are often difficult to repair.

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At some point in most of our lives, we fall in love. Whether we come crashing into love with a storm of fireworks, or if it develops more subtly over time, it's hard to mistake that sensation of love. We are fueled by passion, sexual connection, shared interests and the discovery of each others' mind, heart, body & soul.

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Do you and your partner have a hard time communicating? Do simple conversations seem to end up in an argument? Do you find yourself choosing not to talk at all just to prevent conflict? Have you lost hope or doubt that you will ever be able to have productive and meaningful conversations with your partner again?

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Many of the couples I see in my practice struggle with communication or a lack of intimacy and connection. They say that they don’t feel heard by their significant other, that they spend hours arguing without resolving anything, or it feels like they’re just roommates. Engaging in these patterns over the course of years can erode the trust, care and love that was once the foundation of the relationship.

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Couples often come to counseling feeling distant and wanting connection. They want to feel closer to their partner but don’t know how. Sometimes there is a real sense of loss. The closeness or emotional intimacy that used to be so accessible has disappeared. There can be a fear that you’ll never recover it and that it is gone forever.

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Many theories of couples counseling have something in common; a structured format for communication. This is something that can be learned and practiced on your own, and it helps to fine tune the details with the support of a therapist.

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The idea of setting boundaries with someone you love might seem mysterious, frightening, or even counter-intuitive. Why would you want to set a boundary with someone you’re close to? Don’t you want the “opposite”…openness, trust and flexibility? What is a boundary? Isn’t a boundary just a “new age” term for a wall?

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As simple as this question sounds, many couples come to therapy without a clear sense of what they want, or, if they've been fighting a lot, without the faith that their conflicts or problems can be resolved. They may come too angry or discouraged to talk openly about what they feel and want. Other couples may be so resentful, they focus on what they want their partner to change, instead of what they actually want for their relationship. Sometimes a couple has different perspectives about what they need, or may disagree about the goals of therapy. If you are considering couples' therapy, you may discover that your goals for therapy are actually much different than you expected.

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Our culture—filled with online dating and notions of love at first sight—is extremely excited by, even possibly obsessed, by the idea of love. However, these stories of love tend to disproportionately highlight the beginning of love, when it’s exciting and seems that nothing could go wrong and the rest is easeful history.

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I spent many years alone, living by myself, meditating, eating by myself, and walking by myself. I was my own best friend and proud that I was able to gain such internal peace and holiness.

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The pressure of the “next step” in your relationship can be daunting, especially when that next step is a conversation about whether or not to have children. The desire to have children is not as commonplace as it once was. Research shows a decline in the birth rate overall, and more couples are choosing not to have kids, or having them later on in life. Perhaps the initial desire to postpone parenthood is financially related, but apprehension can also stem from the potential that this addition will strain a romantic relationship.

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People say “money talks” to describe the power of money to persuade, to control an argument or end it. In this blog I want to explore how to communicate effectively about money, and its power in romantic relationships.

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